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What We Want You to Remember About Ruth Ann Henry April 9, 1939 - April 17, 2010
By Betty
Jean Minton, Sister
By Will Henry, son
While most of you knew our Mom as either a friend or coworker, we wanted to share with you some of the things that you may not have known about our very special lady.
If I had to sum my Mom up in one word, I would have to say that above all, she was a “Peace-maker”, she kept our family together. Most of her advice growing up was directed toward keeping peace and doing the right thing. I can still hear her say “Boys, two wrongs don’t make a right”. She would often say “Make things right before you go to bed each night”, “Be the first to say your sorry”, “Don’t go to bed mad at one another” and “Once a word has been spoken, you can never take it back, so be very careful what you say”. Little did I know that even in those early years she was teaching us some important life lessons and more important showing us how to be a good friend, coworker or spouse. To this day I still have to change sides with Sara to make sure I am the one walking closest to the street. “That’s just what a gentleman does” my Mom would explain.
Mom had to be one of the best cooks in the world and always worked hard to make sure we ate together as a family. Her love language was “acts of service” and she loved cooking Dad country fried steak and gravy, David and Hannah chicken-n-dumplings, Christine and Layton waffles and bacon, Sara beans and corn bread and for me, she would make tacos! Not just any tacos but the best pan-fried tacos in the world. From fixing meals, ironing clothes to picking up something from town, she was always more than willing to do whatever needed to be done to help lighten someone else’s load. At the music festivals where Mom and Dad traveled each summer, Mom would always welcome anyone into their campsite and was known for her orange-slice cookies.
Mom was a good story-teller and told Jack Tales and the story of Pacos Bill to many students at local elementary schools. In the summer of 1987 when the family drove out west, Mom had to make sure she dipped her feet into the Pacos River. She had a passion for life and was once known to march/dance along with the jazz players as they traveled down the street in New Orleans. She most always had a sweet smile on her face. I loved that smile. Mom also loved to call square dances. Why, you might ask? Because Mom like to see people happy and it’s hard to dance without being happy. The last few years of her life, she must have watched a thousand Hallmark movies. I used to joke with her about the movies saying they were all the same. But she loved a happy ending and felt blessed to have been married to Dad (her childhood sweetheart). Yes, Mom and Dad played together as children in the very community that they choose to bring us up in. Her ashes will be scattered close to family and at the church she and Dad got married in. Family ties and traditions ran deep for Mom.
If I had to pick just one fond memory of Mom to keep it would be this. I remember picking berries down on our property in Alvarado. Mom had planned to make a cobbler that night and the berries were ripe for the picking. It was very hot that day. I’m sure I ate as many berries as I picked and I really wanted to go swimming in the river when we were done. We had our black lab “Smoky” with us and when we were done picking berries, Mom said that I could swim down the river as she walked along the bank carrying our berries and keeping an eye on me. The water was cool and I remember swimming down the river and looking up to see Mom right there. I remember feeling safe. I remember knowing that Mom was watching over me and would be there if I needed her. That story pretty much sums up how Mom always made me feel and even now that she is gone I still feel as if she is just right there, on the other side of the river watching over me. I too will someday be on that side of the river and I will see her sweet smile again. I will miss her here on earth but I know just where she is. God has her in his arms, but I have her in my heart.
We will see you again, someday, somewhere….
By Sara Henry, Daughter-in-law
Ruth Ann was a memories maker. Everything she did was about God, family, friends, tradition and making memories. She was always “gathering the troops” to spend time together. Whether is was something at church, a special holiday, a fiddlers convention a Sunday meal, or just a weeknight when she hadn’t seen everyone in a while…she would find a way to bring us all together…and it usually involved wheat clusters and tacos J
Ruth Ann was always at the center of things but in the background at the same time…looking back I realize what an amazing feat that was. She would gather us together, tell a story or start an activity and then fade back and let the memories happen. If she disappeared for a while and you wanted to find her you just had to follow the laughter of the kids…and there she would be…on the floor right in the middle of them…playing, reading, snuggling…she loved her grandchildren with a passion I have never seen. I have wondered these past few days if she has always known she would not be here for long because she never missed a chance to teach the kids something, to sit on the floor and play with them, to tell them a story. Right up to the end, she would always insist on climbing into the back of the Suburban, with Hannah on one side and Layton on the other, to drive to our next adventure. She would tell them stories, sing with them and pat their heads as they slept…making memories.
I told her several times in the past few months that I wasn’t finished with her yet…and I’m still not. I know she is watching over me and the whole Henry family…just as she said she would be…and I will continue to call on her for guidance, strength and support.
One of the last things she said to me is…I’ll see you, somewhere….and that brings a smile to my face and puts warmth in my heart because I know she was right…I will see her again…somewhere….
by Christine Henry, Daughter-in-law I’ve only known the Henry’s for about five years, but from the time I met them, Ruth Ann and David, Sr. welcomed me into their hearts as if I was their own daughter. Ruth Ann and I had some great private conversations - conversations about the old times, marriage, love, life and death. She had some wonderful advice that I took to heart and I have learned so much from her. She taught me about forgiveness, about caring and about life lessons that I will treasure forever. She was the greatest of storytellers and I always enjoyed hearing her talk… even about silly things that may not have mattered much to others or even if I’d heard the story many times before. Ruth Ann had the kindest heart and nothing but compassion for everyone she knew, especially her family and her grandchildren. I am honored that today April 2oth, the day my family celebrates my birth, is the day the Lord has chosen to memorialize the life of this very special woman. I love you with all my heart Ruth Ann. You are finally at peace.
By
David Henry, Jr., son
One of the first things mom taught me as a child was to treat people with kindness. I can still hear her say “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. What a great piece of advice this was. I grew up seeing my mother live her life treating people the way she wanted to be treated. She lived life to the fullest and loved us all unconditionally.
My best childhood memories were of mom and I on summer vacations at Myrtle Beach. I remember going to Krispy Kream early one morning and getting a dozen hot donuts for us to have for breakfast. By the time we pulled into the hotel parking lot mom, Will and I had eaten 12 donuts and we had to go back for more. She loved walking on the beach looking for shells and sharks teeth. She always had a little change purse with money for ice cream or something to drink. She loved seafood and I learned to love it at an early age as well. I remember walking in the sand holding hands with her. I would look over my shoulder and watch the waves splash against the sand washing our footprints away as we continued down the beach. Our footprints were gone in no time but those memories we made together will last forever.
Mom was so excited about news of a grandchild. None of us knew if we would be blessed with a boy or a girl but her beautiful smile and happy face took on a new glow when she held Hannah for the first time. Her world could not have been any better because now she had one more person to love and do things for. You see this is how mom loved people….. she did things for you. Sometimes little things, sometimes big things, during good times or bad times. I always knew that mom was there for me with words of encouragement and love. The birth of a grandson named after the man she spent a lifetime loving was another special day for mom. She told me how much she had always loved dad and how honored they both were that their grandson would carry on the family name. The memories of Ruth Ann and David Henry would be passed on for yet another generation.
In life there are so many unknowns. Mom always said that life on earth was short and that Heaven would be forever. A place where there would be no sadness, no sickness and no suffering. On Saturday morning, April 17th, I started my truck to go meet the family at the hospital and I had left the radio on the night before. The song “Heaven” by Los Lonely Boys was playing. The sky was so blue and the grass so green. The verse “How far is Heaven” played softly and I thought to myself….. not far mom….. not far.
By Karen Jackson, mother of Hannah and Layton
I’m not sure how to share a woman like Ruthann in a few sentences, but here are the things I would like you to know. Ruthann loved God, loved her family, and loved her church, in that order. She loved others with her whole heart, never keeping anything for herself. When I came into the Henry family, she loved me immediately and unconditionally as her daughter. It was as natural as if I had been there my whole life. She quickly imparted on me all the knowledge and wisdom she longed to share with a daughter. She taught me to knit, to make home-made grape jelly and how to make all of her family’s favorite recipes. But I learned much more than she taught. I learned that being a wife is more than saying “I do”. It’s saying “I’m sorry” even when I haven’t done anything wrong, it’s forgiving when I don’t feel like it, it’s learning to love what they love, and it’s giving all of yourself even on days when you don’t have anything to give. I learned that being a mother is more than just saying “I love you”. It’s baking cookies for the school party at midnight because, oops, they forgot to tell you until bedtime that they signed you up, it’s saying “no” because it’s right instead of saying “yes” because it’s easy, it’s putting a smile on your face when your heart is breaking or your temper’s boiling, and it’s making sure they know you love them no matter what messes they end up in. Then when Hannah and Layton came into the family they were her true joy. There was never a dull moment at Grandma’s house. They cooked, they cleaned, they washed lots and lots of dishes. They read, they played, they rode bikes, they went to town. They planted gardens, they made jelly, they sang songs. They played music, they made cookies, they told stories. She gave them the best gift of all, herself. I hope someday they will realize how lucky they were to have her in their life. Ruthann was never a mother-in-law, but a second mother and more importantly a friend. She always had a smile in her heart, a kind word to say and a helping hand to lend. I rejoice for her as God has called her home to be with her heavenly family, but I am sad for those she left behind. I will miss her more than anyone knows, but look forward to the day I’ll see her again when we’re no longer separated by pain or tears or broken families.
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